50 Ways to Love Him...

The other day I was finishing up a book about marriage. If there's one thing that has become my favorite past time in the last year, it has been reading. Since we moved a year ago this week, we have gone one year without a TV....and before you raise your eyes & think, "What?!"....I can say it's been the greatest thing for our home & our marriage.

It's not the television that is wrong or bad, but what is 'on' the television that can be wrong or bad. We've seen a difference even in the behavior in our boys as they go most days without watching anything. This is not a post about television & I'm not against wholesome entertainment..so I'll get back to my topic....marriage. Many of us who are married have spent countless hours in front of the television or computer soaking up a lot of useless information about movies, celebrities, or the latest tv series...but we fail to take as much interest in our spouse!!

I think we could all agree that Doctors and lawyers go to school for their profession for many years with hours of studying under their belts before they are given their title. And yet, those of us who 'are' or 'want' to have the title of.... 'Husband' or 'Wife' 'Mother' or 'Father'.... never crack open a book about it. Never read up on our profession so to speak. I was for a long time, very passive about this and it reminds me of the verse, "Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." 2 Timothy 2:15 If I am going to be able to recognize good advice or 'truth' when I read, see, or hear it I should be studied up!=) I should really know my spouse, and take a strong interest in his interests, his feelings, his needs.

May I encourage you to dig deeply into Ephesians 5, 1 Peter 3, and Proverbs 31...not to mention the piles of examples in the Bible of wives who helped their husbands and wives who hindered their husbands. What do you know of David's wife, Michael?? or Moses's wife Zepporah in Exodus 4....she missed out on the one of the most famous events of all time! or Lott's wife, Job's wife, or King Solomon's wives as they turned his heart away from God. What about Hannah? (One of my most favorite women in the Bible) or Ruth? She was the great grandmother of David, can you imagine what kind of a godly wife & woman she was? The Bible is FULL of golden nuggets to put strength in our marriages...start digging!

I don't mean to paint a fairytale picture to you that I have a perfect marriage or that I am a perfect spouse, because I fail greatly. I'm always eager to learn more from people's experiences, advice, & God's Word of how I can better love my husband. But I will tell you I'm most happily married, and there's no-one in the world I'd rather be married to than Daniel. He is my prince charming & the King of our little home;)...and I'm proud to say he's mine!

So...like I mentioned as I was finishing up a book on marriage I was thinking how many times I've had friends come to me for prayer or advice about their marriage. Maybe it's because my husband is an assistant Pastor or maybe it's because I try to be a listening, non-judgemental ear with a heart of compassion...but whatever the reason, they come.

Maybe you've confided in a friend recently about the struggles, joys, or hardships of your marriage..but I wanted to share with you a list of '50 ways to love your spouse'.

We will all face hard times in our marriages, because our hearts are deceitful & desperately wicked as Jeremiah 17:9 tell us. When my deceitful hearts tries to tell me,"He's not a good husband!" or my selfishness rises within me and says, "He doesn't meet MY needs" I'm reminded of this verse & the Lord gives me the ability to love his imperfections.

I recently heard this quote about True Love...a topic which I feel the urge to blog about soon:)...but this definition I wrote in the cover of my Bible as I believe it sums it up perfectly.

"True Love is an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person for life."

I believe the Lord Himself proves this to be true when he said, "I shall never leave thee nor forsake thee." I'm am so very imperfect & yet he unconditionally loves me!

One thing I've had to put to practice in my life...and often... is to NOT allow myself to even think negative thoughts of my husband. When we dwell on things that bother us we only become frustrated. I've made it a habit to give those thoughts to the Lord & I'm them reminded of His unconditional commitment to me, & He gives me that 'True Love' for my husband.

So whether you are finding your marriage to be less than peaceful these days or if you are enjoying your marriage...here is a list of '50 Ways To Love Your Spouse'
(I've made bold the ones that I thought were especially sweet!;)

1. Love Yourself
2. Start each day with a hug.
3. Serve breakfast in bed.
4. Say "I love you" ever time you part ways.
5. Compliment freely and often.
6. Appreciate-and celebrate-your differences.
7. Live each day as if it's your last.
8. Write unexpected love letters.
9. Plant a seed together and nurture it to maturity.
10. Go on a date once every week.
11. Send flowers for no reason.
12. Accept and love each other's family and friends.
13. Make little signs that say "I love you" and post them all over the place.
14. Stop and smell the roses.
15. Kiss unexpectedly.
16. Seek out beautiful sunsets together.
17. Apologize sincerely.
18. Be forgiving.
19. Remember the day you fell in love-and recreate it.
20. Hold hands.
21. Say "I love you" with your eyes.
22. Let her cry in your arms.
23. Tell him you understand.
24. Speak words of love and commitment.
25. Do somethings arousing.
26. Let her give you directions when you are lost.
27. Laugh at his jokes.
28. Appreciate her inner beauty.
29. Do the other person's chores for a day.
30. Encourage wonderful dreams.
31. Commit a public display of affection.
32. Give loving messages with no strings attached.
33. Start a love journal and record your special moments.
34. Calm each other's fears.
35. Walk barefoot on the beach together.
36. Ask her to marry you again.
37. Say yes.
38. Respect each other.
39. Be your partner's biggest fan.
40. Give the love your partner wants.
41. Give the love you want to receive.
42. Show interest in the other's work.
43. Work on a project together.
44. Build a fort with blankets.
45. Swing as high as you can on a swing set by moonlight.
46. Have a picnic indoors on a rainy day.
47. Never go to bed mad.
48. Put your partner first in your prayers.
49. Kiss each other goodnight.
50. Sleep like spoons.
(I believe this list is from the book 'Chicken soup for the Couple's soul' I haven't read that book, but I found this list in another book;)

Now let's go try some of these!!=)....and maybe you could print out the list with a sweet note & leave it on your honey's pillow...since there are some good ones for him to0!=)